Ask The Mask, Vol. 2, Issue 6

Before we reveal this week's new letters, it's time for a new teacher problem for you to solve! Here's Mr. Linquist:

If you have advice for Mr. Linquist, please fill out this form. If we like your response, we might include it in our next issue! You can also continue sending The Mask letters about your own problems using the original form. Last week, Mrs. Burstein shared with us her concern that as a morning person, she has so much “pep” in the morning that her students don’t know what to do with it. Thank you to everyone who submitted ideas! Here are our top five:

• “Do some exercise in the morning to get some of that pep out, or meditation to calm down a little.” ~ anonymous
• “Start off the day with a game of charades while you prep the room.” ~ anonymous
• “Play the Rocky theme and have them do the Rocky climb dance to pump up.” ~ Ms. Papini
• “Coffee for students to help them compete with your pep!” ~ Mr. Adams
• “You should be you and have them just deal with it.” ~ anonymous

Okay, now for our new letters:

Dear Mask,

Okay, so my dilemma is that my grades are not so great and parent-teacher conferences are on Friday. I don't want my teachers to bring it up, and I don't want to get into more trouble.

Sincerely,

Concerned Bean

Dear Concerned Bean,

Parent-teacher conferences are for talking about you and how you are doing in school, and unfortunately, that includes your grades. Your parents sound passionate about you doing a good job in school, so having a teacher talk out of the blue about how you are not doing great can be jarring. I recommend talking to your parents in advance. I know this sounds scary, but sit them down, admit that your grades are not very good, and tell them that you will work hard to improve. Hopefully your parents will see how much courage this takes and go easy on you. I believe in you!

Hopefully,

The Mask

Dear Mask,

My older brother can get nervous and anxious sometimes, and when I try to help him he just yells at me like I’m the cause of the problem. I just want to be understanding and helpful. How can I help?

Sincerely,

The Li’l Bro

San Jose, CA

Dear The Li’l Bro,

Getting yelled at is never fun, especially when you have good intentions. I have siblings too, and there are many instances when I wish they would treat me more like a friend rather than like an annoyance. Sometimes there's nothing you can do other than give them some space. If you want to do something nice, try making some cookies or writing your brother a note to leave on his bed. I admire your determination to help. I can tell you are a good sibling. 

Lovingly,

The Mask

Dear Mask,

I am a twin and they like my twin more than me. It makes me feel left out. They also invite my twin and not me. I don’t know what to do. Can you help?

Sincerely,

Not the Better Twin

San Jose, CA

Dear Not the Better Twin,

Sometimes the best thing to do is put yourself out there. Hang out with them and try to become closer friends. They may be inviting your twin because they are closer friends with your twin, or perhaps they think you don’t enjoy hanging out with them. Be confident and sure of yourself; don’t hang out in the background because you think people don’t like you. Also, don’t forget you can also make new friends! You don’t need to be in the same friend group as your twin; in fact, many twins have separate groups of friends. I hope you figure things out and enjoy your friendships.

In friendship,

The Mask

Dear Mask,

I've been wondering a lot about Science Camp. I’m wondering what type of outdoorsy stuff would we do, what activities we would do, and so on. I'm pretty excited but nervous. Since I've never been camping before, could you give me some tips for me, please?

Sincerely,

Non-Very Camping Girl

San Jose, CA

Dear Non-Very Camping Girl,

It’s stressful to go away for the first time. Your first night may be a little difficult at first because your loved ones aren’t around. But once you get past the first night, I bet you’re going to feel a lot better. I remember the first time I slept away from home. My parents had to drag me out of the house like I was some kind of stone. But in all seriousness, just try your best to enjoy it. If you are nervous about some of the things you might be doing, I recommend asking a teacher or older student about what it’s like. Trust me, there are plenty of fun activities. Although it may seem like a daunting challenge, believe me that you will have a great time and enjoy yourself. You won’t regret this experience no matter what comes your way.

Campily,

The Mask

Dear Mask,

I find comparing myself to my friends is what my brain wants, and it’s usually like if my brain wants me to do something, I do it. I also feel forgotten when some of my friends do stuff I can’t, like have a phone. I feel left out. What do I do?

Sincerely,

Sad Friend

San Jose, CA

Dear Sad Friend,

When I was in elementary school, I was told I couldn’t get a phone until I was in high school. It was hard to see other kids with phones. But as I got older, I also realized the trouble that came with a phone: having to carry it around all the time, dealing with spam, and getting sucked into your phone all day, causing you to miss some fun opportunities to connect with people in person. I totally get wanting to have a friend’s number. If you have access to a computer or tablet, I would recommend getting an email account or a Messenger for Kids account so that you can still text your friends without a phone. It is hard to go through life without comparing yourself to others, but sometimes it's worth it to be a little different.

Ring ring,

The Mask

Dear Mask,

I love climbing trees. It's my passion, and not to brag, but I'm pretty decent at it. But when I climb trees and get more than 10 feet up, my mommy starts yelling at me and tells me to get down. I know she's trying to keep me safe, but she frequently holds me back from my passion even though I'm fully aware I will probably break my leg or neck or get a mild severe concussion. I’m also very careful and make sure the tree is good.

Sincerely,

Girl Who Likes to Climb Trees

San Jose, CA

Dear Girl Who Likes to Climb Trees,

This is a very difficult predicament. Here are a few options that might help. To quench your need to climb, feel free to ask your mommy to take you to one of the many rock climbing gyms in the area. If your need for trees is just too strong for a substitute such as rock climbing, you can ask your mommy if you can climb trees as long as she watches you and chooses which tree you climb. If she is still very stubborn about your tree climbing, talk to your mommy and try to come up with a compromise. Perhaps you can negotiate up to 15 feet high rather than ten! If all else fails, you may feel tempted to resort to threats, like stealing your mommy’s phone, climbing up a tree, and telling her that you’ll drop it if she doesn’t let you climb trees. However, that is unlikely to result in a ticket to the next tree-climbing olympics.

Higher!

The Mask

Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed on this website are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of Almaden Country Day School. Any content provided by our bloggers or authors are of their opinion, and are not intended to replace parental or professional advice. 

Ask The Mask, Vol. 2, Issue 5

Before we reveal this week's letters, we are unveiling a new feature of Ask The Mask! Each week, we will post a short video in which an ACDS teacher tells us about one of their problems. You — yes, you! — are invited to fill out this form with advice for the teacher. If we like your response, we might include it in our next issue. First up is Mrs. Burstein!

Click here to submit advice for Mrs. Burstein!

Click here to send a letter to Ask The Mask!

Dear Mask,

There is this girl one grade younger than me and I like her. I want to ask her out, but I don’t know if people will accept our relationship because of our age difference. What do you think I should do?

Sincerely,

Confused Crusher

San Jose, CA

Dear Confused Crusher,

The funny thing about relationships is that the older you get, the less the age gap seems to matter. For example, a sixth grader dating an eighth grader seems HUGE, but a 24-year-old dating a 26-year-old is perfectly normal. Your happiness comes first, so if you want to ask someone out who’s only one grade younger than you, go ahead! You don't need people to accept or validate your relationship for it to be a real relationship. It is perfectly normal and quite common for people to date others who are not in the same grade, and there is nothing to be ashamed of or nervous about.

Good luck!

The Mask

Dear Mask,

I’m not sure what to do. Sometimes my friends and I know we aren’t supposed to do something, but they do it anyway. I don’t want to snitch on them and get them in trouble, but I also don’t want to participate in breaking the rules. Most of the time, I end up telling them that they shouldn’t do it, but if they do then it’s their responsibility. But I still have a bad feeling that they’re going to get caught. What should I do?

Sincerely,

Buzz Kill

San Jose, CA

Dear Buzz Kill,

It seems like you really care about your friends, but it must be frustrating when your friends are doing things you know they shouldn't be. It is important not to participate in breaking the rules. Sometimes when peer pressure wins, you can end up doing things that you will seriously regret in the future. I also think it is important to tell them that they shouldn't be doing this and make sure they understand the consequences if they are caught. If it's something dangerous that you feel an adult or teacher should know about, it is the right thing to tell them; you can always do it anonymously. At times, there is nothing you can do except remind your friends not to participate. I hope you can convince them to do the right thing!

Legally, 

The Mask

Dear Mask,

I started unmasking at school and at home and I really enjoyed it, but now Covid is flaring up again and my parents say I need to mask again. I don’t want to get Covid, but I also don’t want to start masking again. What do you think I should do?

Sincerely,

Masked Kid

San Jose, CA

Dear Masked Kid,

I understand how you feel, My family is also extremely cautious when it comes to getting Covid. Winter is a season commonly filled with all types of illness. I know it can be frustrating having to wear a mask, but your parents are just trying to keep not only you but your entire family safe and healthy. Studies do show that if you wear a mask in general, your chance of getting Covid is reduced by 70%. If this makes you feel any better, I am wearing a mask right now too. So my advice to you is to stay strong for the both of us, and we will get through this. It is better to be safe than sorry! 

Masked,

The Mask

Dear Mask,

In my social studies class, we often discuss our thoughts on the topic with the people sitting next to us. I love hearing my classmates’ thoughts, but I’m often afraid to share my own. I know my opinions are very different from others, and sometimes I feel like there’s no point in sharing because no one will agree with or understand my perspective. Should I start sharing more in class, or should I continue to keep quiet?

Sincerely,

Outsider

San Jose, CA

Dear Outsider,

I agree that sharing your opinions can be hard, especially when other people might disagree with you. Here’s something you might not have thought about: There might be other people who share your opinions, but they are also nervous to share them. In fact, there could be many people in your class who feel the same way, but until someone like you speaks up, nobody will know. Even if people don’t have the same opinion as you do, it can be helpful to understand other people’s perspectives, and you can help add interesting thoughts to the discussion. Who knows, maybe you’ll even be able to change someone else’s mind to agree with you! I hope you’ll soon find the courage to share.

Encouragingly,

The Mask

Dear Mask,

I have this person in my grade, and she is really annoying sometimes. She is mean, gets all up in my business, and sometimes makes me really upset. We have known each other since either kindergarten or preschool. I have tried to put up with her many times, but she always seems to want to create drama for other people like me. What should I do about her?

Sincerely,

Person Who Gets Annoyed

Willow Glen, CA

Dear Person Who Gets Annoyed,

It can be really frustrating when people seem to do everything they can to make life harder for you. Sometimes people don't realize that what they are doing is hurtful to you. Perhaps they feel that what they are saying and doing is funny and perfectly acceptable. Be sure to confront this person about what she is doing and how it makes you feel. Tell her that what she is doing is not okay and cannot continue. If all else fails, the best option is to separate yourself from people who make you so upset. Try your best to ignore her and separate yourself from whatever she is doing to frustrate you. It can be really hard to just walk away from someone you've known for a long time, but sometimes it's for the best. Be sure not to let one person stand in the way of your happiness.

Supportively,

The Mask 

Dear Mask,

Life is like a game of cards. Everything you do is a different card. And it just seems like I’m not getting those good cards. I’m not blaming everyone; it’s just that I get in so much trouble everywhere and I get yelled at at school and at home. I also push it over the top sometimes, and almost every day I get yelled at by my mom because I can’t even go to school early.

Sincerely,

Jumbled Sad Bull

California

Dear Jumbled Sad Bull,

I get how you feel. Some days I feel like the only cards I pull out are the worst ones. I know it can be hard, especially if people keep getting frustrated with you, but you should try to stay positive. Even small things, like a nice conversation you had with a friend, or a cool fact you learned, can help you see good aspects of your life. Try to remember those happy moments when something bad happens, and you can realize that not everything is so horrible. I also recommend talking to some of the people who keep yelling at you. Tell them that their actions are making you stressed out, and hopefully they will adjust how they are communicating with you. This might seem silly, but you should at least give it a shot. I believe in you.

Positively,

The Mask

Dear Mask,

I don’t know if I should act like myself. Everyone says that you should be yourself, but what if myself is a bad person? I’m never in a good mood, as much as I try to act like it, and sometimes I backhandedly insult my friends when I don’t know what to say. Then I spend the rest of the day hating myself because of something I said or did. My friends don’t seem to notice it, but I’m not sure if they’re just trying to be nice. Should I really be myself?

Sincerely,

A Bad Person

San Jose, CA

Dear A Bad Person, 

Was that too mean? Did I do something wrong? These might be the questions that go through your head after you say something, but it’s important to remember that we have all gone through this. Happily, I am still friends with all of the people I’ve accidentally insulted. You should be yourself in any situation, because your letter makes it obvious that you are someone who cares about other people. If somehow you upset them or think you might have upset them, simply apologize in a way that shows you are sincere. Apologizing and being honest about your feelings can even put you in a better mood. No matter what, always be yourself.

Admiringly,

The Mask

Dear Mask,

I've always debated whether I like cream cheese or not. Is it cheese? Is it cream? Sometimes it's too thick; sometimes it’s not thick enough. That’s why I need The Mask to help me out with this dilemma.

Sincerely,

Struggling Jalapeño Popper

San Jose, CA

Dear Struggling Jalapeño Popper,

It can be hard to find the right cream cheese. But just remember that both cream and cheese are dairy products, so it’s kind of the same either way. If you decide you don’t like cream cheese, here’s another dairy product for you: butter! It’s good on everything, including toast, bagels, and sandwiches.

Okay, now here’s a similar question for you: I've always debated whether I like peanuts or not. Is it a pea? Is it a nut? Sometimes it’s too crunchy; sometimes it’s not crunchy enough. That’s why I need Struggling Jalapeño Popper to help me out with this dilemma.

Reciprocally,

The Mask, San Jose, CA

Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed on this website are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of Almaden Country Day School. Any content provided by our bloggers or authors are of their opinion, and are not intended to replace parental or professional advice.