Dear Mask,
I NEED to be popular. I strive to have everyone like me, but I feel like nobody likes me. I'm begging on my knees to be popular. It’s my dream to be popular. I would sell my soul to be popular! Do you have any advice?
Sincerely,
The Weekdys
Springfield
Dear The Weekdys,
I know the feeling. Being “popular,” or being liked by everyone, can be very beneficial. It can help you make new friends, have fewer enemies, and know more people in general. However, be careful. An obsession rarely leads to a good outcome. Sometimes, when you try so hard to get people to like you, it can become so annoying to people that they actually start to NOT like you, which ruins the whole effort. So I would suggest just being yourself, and trying to be kind to everyone. Over time, people will realize how cool you are, and you will reach your goal to be popular.
Authentically,
The Mask
Dear Mask,
I don't know when it became cool to say things like "widuwwy" and "gwiddy," but it's super annoying. It's like a new language of cringe. Every time I overhear the boys, they sprinkle in "skibidi" or "what the flip," and it's getting to me. When did eighth grade boys start talking like nine-year-olds?! All the memes they say are dead, all the jokes they make are terrible, and yet they wonder why the girls separate so much from the boys in class and at lunch. I usually wouldn't even write about this and not care, but the problem is… Some of these numbskull boys are actually pretty cute. I think I could ask one out, but I do not want to talk with someone who brings in "sigma edit ohio skibidi kai cenat griddy moment" every five seconds. Argh! What can I do to try to fix them, or at least one of them?
Sincerely,
Annoyed Girl
San Jose, CA
Dear Annoyed Girl,
I agree that hearing this stuff every day can really get to you. It’s annoying, especially when you’re really trying to focus on something and then you hear someone scream “what the flip!” If you want to make a cute boy stop, simply give him a taste of his own medicine. Make up some random words of your own that will annoy him, and keep inserting them into sentences when he’s around. If he gets so annoyed that he calls you out, tell him that this is exactly how you have been feeling. Tell him you want to have real conversations, with real words. If you still don’t think you can ask him out, then at least you’ve made an impression!
Widuwwy,
The Mask
I like this person, but I don't think he likes me back. I try to forget about him because there is no point, but every time I see him it just gets worse and my mind keeps spinning. I don't know if I should tell him I like him, or if I should use some method to forget him. Please help me!
Sincerely,
Unforgettable Person
Dear Unforgettable Person,
It can be hard having a crush, especially when they don’t like you back. If you aren’t close to him, you might as well tell him, because there is no existing relationship to ruin. You might not want to tell him if you are close, though, because that might make stuff awkward. In that case, you should become obsessed with someone else as quickly as possible so that he will fall out of your affection!
Forgetfully,
The Mask
Dear Mask,
I have a crush on three girls, and I want to ask one of them to the upcoming social. The problem is that I have no clue which one to ask out! One of them is the nicest to me out of the three, one is super super pretty, and one I have no clue why I like (but I do!). Which one should I ask, and if you don't know, can you help me go about this?
Sincerely,
Confused Student
San Jose, CA
Dear Confused Student,
You know that the nice girl will be nice to you during the social if you decide to ask her. You’ll most likely have a good time with her and have positive interactions. A potential downside is that if she doesn't like you back, she might be too nice to say so, making things awkward later. Being pretty affects people’s opinions and perceptions, so that shouldn’t be the only quality you look for in a person. She needs to have a good personality too, and be nice to you and maybe funny. About this third girl… You don’t know why you like her, and it’s worth figuring it out. Is she smart? Unique? Funny? If you really don’t know why you like her, then maybe you don’t know her that well. Try to get to know her better before you ask her out. In any case, good luck getting any of the three to say yes!
Hopefully,
The Mask
Dear Mask,
Okay, so basically our noses hurt. The boys keep wearing way too much cologne. Like in P.E., when they pass you, it's like a poof of ickiness. Like, why do they wear so much? Sol de Janeiro is better and way more aesthetic and preppy. And cologne is not it. So what should I do to get rid of the icky smell of these boys?
Sincerely,
P.U.
Dear P.U.,
I agree. Strong scents like perfume and cologne can get really irritating eventually. If it’s not all of the boys, try to avoid the ones that wear all of that cologne. Breathing through your mouth is also a time-tested tactic. Another way to handle it is to explain it to them, because they might not realize how irritating that smell is to you. But remember the reason they are using so much cologne in the first place is to cover up some nasty body odor. Talk about icky!!! So, tell them that if they feel smelly, they should take a shower, not bomb people’s noses.
Fragrantly,
The Mask
Dear Mask,
Lately things have been rough. Ever since my youngest platypus Bartholomew Jr the 4th died after walking into oncoming traffic, I've been very lonely, even with Bartholomew Jr the 2d (he's very old). I thought I found a solution, but it isn't going as I planned. There were these silly possums that live in my backyard and that seemed to be very polite, so I decided to climb on my lemon tree and tame one. I named him Beautiful Princess and I love him very much and so does Bartholomew Jr the 2nd. It really feels like our late friend’s soul is living inside him. But my mommy doesn't approve because of the earlier platypus incident, and now I’m very sad and lonely and currently crying in my bedroom while watching a soap opera and eating expired condensed milk because I’m mourning the loss of Bartholomew Jr the 4th, I have no friends or possums, and it feels like my mommy doesn't trust me! What do I do?
Sincerely,
Very Very Sad Person
San Jose, CA
Dear Very Very Sad Person,
I am sorry for your loss. It must be very upsetting to have witnessed the most superior animal in history die in such a tragic manner. If you really love possums, I think you should return to your lemon tree and rescue Beautiful Princess. Make sure to get a proper enclosure for him so that he feels at home. Or you can keep him in your basement, if you have a basement. Make sure to take him for walks and give him only the freshest possum food and most refreshing water. In the near future, you could be watching soap operas and eating expired condensed milk – together.
Optimistically,
The Mask
Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed on this website are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of Almaden Country Day School. Any content provided by our bloggers or authors are of their opinion, and are not intended to replace parental or professional advice.
